


Wounds that never heal

by Sionna_Raven



Series: Snacks and Letters: the naughty parts [11]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-04
Updated: 2013-04-04
Packaged: 2017-12-07 11:26:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sionna_Raven/pseuds/Sionna_Raven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On a dark night all Severus can do is to be there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wounds that never heal

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Memories of Azkaban, do I need to say more? Nothing graphic though.

I knew the past left its traces on him and even more inside, but he had convinced me that he could cope. When we are together Sirius always seems so strong, so much in control of everything. “No harm done....”

It took me by surprise when a hysterical Kreacher woke me up one night.

“You've got to come! Master Sirius..... he needs you. Get up!”

He didn't give me the time to get dressed or something. The moment I opened my eyes, he grabbed me and Disapparated us to Sirius' bedroom..... which looked empty.

“Where is he?”

Kreacher pointed under the bed. I expected to find Padfoot sleeping on a blanket. I knew he did that sometimes to avoid the nightmares, but it was Sirius, Sirius in human form, crouched in the farthest corner between the bedpost and the wall. He was shivering, whimpering, muttering.

“Kreacher can't get him out, Master Severus. He doesn't recognize Kreacher. Master please, you've got to do something.”

I stuck my head under the bed. “Sirius, come out. You're scaring the elf. Sirius...” I put my hand on his shoulder and he tried to crawl away.

“Don't... don't make me.... I can't …. I've done what you wanted. …. Not again, please. I can't take more, please....”

I crawled back and stood up. There was only one way to get him out.

“Black! Come out! Stop whining, you pure-blooded piece of shit! Get out or you'll regret it!”

Kreacher had fallen to his knees, clutching the other bedpost, crying. I wished he would stop. I didn't want to hurt his master, but he didn't know where he was.

Noises, he was moving.

“Get out, Black. I'm not waiting any longer!”

A shaggy mob of black hair appeared from under the bed. He crawled out, still shivering, not daring to look up, cowering at my feet. I don't think I've ever felt so much hatred, hatred for those who did that to him.

Sirius let out a sob. “Dumbledore.... you promised.... need to talk to Dumbledore.... anything, I do anything..... Dumbledore, you've got to tell him.”

He raised his hand to open my.... ….......Salazar help me!

“No Black! Not that. Get on the bed.”

He obeyed, stopped his sobbing, so submissive, so resigned. “Dumbledore... you'll tell him?.... I'll be good. I'll do what you like... you know I'm good at it.”

I tugged him in and cast a warming spell.

“It's all right, Sirius. Dumbledore knows. You don't need to do anything. They won't hurt you anymore. You're safe.”

His grey eyes stared through me, blank, not taking in any of his surroundings.

“Safe? You're not...?”

“No, Sirius, I'm not going to hurt you. You're safe. Nobody's going to touch you ever again.” Not while I live. A shimmer of hope appeared in his eyes, the unquenchable trust that helped him to survive. The trust that always baffles me. I held him in my arms until he fell asleep.

It happens again every few months for no apparent reason. He never speaks about it. Neither do I.

When the Death Eaters took over Azkaban, the surviving guards or what was left of them, were given to the Dementors. Those who escaped were caught by Snatchers during the Dark Year. If one of them made it out alive, he'd better not cross my path.


End file.
